Your source for famous proverbs
Currently featuring 40,281 quotes and sayings

Steve Martin quotes

born 14 August 1945, American comedian, producer and author

Hollywood must be the only place on earth where you can get fired by someone wearing a
Hawaiian shirt and a baseball cap.
Steve Martin

All I've ever wanted was an honest week's pay for an honest day's work.
Steve Martin

When your hobbies get in the way of your work – that's ok; but when your hobbies get in the
way of themselves… well.
Steve Martin

Boy, those French! They have a different word for everything.
Steve Martin

I believe that sex is the most beautiful, natural, and wholesome thing that money can buy.
Steve Martin

Love is a promise delivered already broken.
Steve Martin

I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I
am to them.
Steve Martin

The greatest thing you can do is surprise yourself.
Steve Martin

Writers block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink
alcohol.
Steve Martin

Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.
Steve Martin

A celebrity is any well-known TV or movie star who looks like he spends more than two hours
working on his hair.
Steve Martin

I've heard lots of people lie to themselves but they never fool anyone.
Steve Martin

You know what your problem is? It's that you haven't seen enough movies - all of life's riddles
are answered in the movies.
Steve Martin

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
Steve Martin

I believe you should place a woman on a pedestal high enough so you can look up her dress.
Steve Martin

I've got to keep breathing. It'll be my worst business mistake if I don't.
Steve Martin

You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.
Steve Martin

I saw the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" and was surprised because I didn't see any
tigers or dragons. And then I realized why: they're crouching and hidden.
Steve Martin

You know, you're really nobody in LA unless you live in a house with a really big door.
Steve Martin

Don't have sex. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.
Steve Martin

First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
Steve Martin

Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way.
Steve Martin

I used to smoke marijuana. But I'll tell you something: I would only smoke it in the late
evening. Oh, occasionally the early evening, but usually the late evening - or the
mid-evening. Just the early evening, mid-evening and late evening. Occasionally, early
afternoon, early mid-afternoon, or perhaps the late-midafternoon. Oh, sometimes the
early-mid-late-early morning... But never at dusk! Never at dusk, I would never do that.
Steve Martin

I'm not into that one-night thing. I think a person should get to know someone and even be
in love with them before you use them and degrade them.
Steve Martin

Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke.
Steve Martin

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.
Steve Martin

I believe entertainment can aspire to be art, and can become art, but if you set out to make
art you're an idiot.
Steve Martin

I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper.
Steve Martin