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Smoking quotes page 1

Smoking is indispensable if one has nothing to kiss.
Sigmund Freud

I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to
the time he killed himself.
Johnny Carson

I believe that pipe smoking contributes to a somewhat calm and objective judgement in all
human affairs.
Albert Einstein

If you can keep your son off the pipe and your daughter off the pole, you're ahead of the
game.
Chris Rock

The believing we do something when we do nothing is the first illusion of tobacco.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is more profitable for your Congressman to support the tobacco industry than your life.
Jackie Mason

They say if you stop smoking, you'll get your sense of smell back. I live in New York City, why
would I want my sense of smell back?
Bill Hicks

I'll tell you why I like the cigarette business. It costs a penny to make. Sell it for a dollar. It's
addictive. And there's a fantastic brand loyalty.
Warren Buffett

For the first time in history, sex is more dangerous than the cigarette afterward.
Jay Leno

A cigarette is the perfect type of a perfect pleasure. It is exquisite and leaves one quite
unsatisfied. What more can one want?
Oscar Wilde

It is easier to prevent bad habits than to break them.
Benjamin Franklin

I was in a cab in New York. The cab had a sign, "Please do not smoke, Christ is our unseen
guest." This guy was reaching. I figure, if he could overcome being nailed to a cross, I don't
think a Marlboro Light's gonna faze him that much.
Bill Hicks

Of two cigars pick the longest and strongest.
Sir Winston Churchill

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of
times.
Mark Twain

People copy, people steal. Most of the pictures they make nowadays are loaded down with
special effects. I couldn't do that. I quit smoking because I couldn't reload my Zippo.
Billy Wilder

- Even passive smoking kills.
- Not often enough.
Basic Instinct, 1992

I used to smoke marijuana. But I'll tell you something: I would only smoke it in the late
evening. Oh, occasionally the early evening, but usually the late evening - or the
mid-evening. Just the early evening, mid-evening and late evening. Occasionally, early
afternoon, early mid-afternoon, or perhaps the late-midafternoon. Oh, sometimes the
early-mid-late-early morning... But never at dusk! Never at dusk, I would never do that.
Steve Martin

Smoking cigars is like falling in love. First you are attracted to its shape; you stay with it for
its flavor; and you must always remember never, never, let the flame go out.
Sir Winston Churchill

The only thing that has ever held you back from having what you want in life is the size of
your BUT... Our BUTS are huge. And the longer we sit on them, the more they continue to
grow! Here are just three examples that people who are stuck on their BUTS have shared
with me over the years:
"I'd exercise and eat right, BUT I just don't have the time!"
"I'd quit smoking, BUT I'm too stressed out."
"I'd ask that girl out, BUT what if she rejects me?"
Sean Stephenson

It is difficult to free fools from the chains they revere.
Voltaire

I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time.
Mark Twain

Tobacco is my favorite vegetable.
Frank Zappa

If I'd taken my doctor's advice and quit smoking when he advised me to, I wouldn't have lived
to go to his funeral.
George Burns

Why did anyone think a camel is a good product image for a cigarette? I think each one is the
equivalent tar of smoking an actual camel.
Jerry Seinfeld

My eight-year-old bought a bicycle with the money he saved by not smoking.
Phyllis Diller

It should not be an act of social disobedience to light a cigarette. Unless you're actually a
doctor working at an incubator.
Dylan Moran

I've smoked ten marijuana cigarettes in my life. And they've given me a sore throat, a
headache, and made me sleepy. I can't understand why anyone would wanna use the stuff.
It seems such an impractical pastime as you can get sent to jail for it.
Frank Zappa

They lie about marijuana. Tell you pot-smoking makes you unmotivated. Lie! When you're high,
you can do everything you normally do just as well - you just realize that it's not worth the
fucking effort. There is a difference.
Bill Hicks

I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.
George Burns

The smoke from burning marijuana contains many more cancer-causing substances than
tobacco. And if that isn't enough it leads to bronchitis and emphysema. If adults want to
take such chances that is their business. But surely the communications media... should let
four million youngsters know what they are risking.
Ronald Reagan

Happiness? A good martini, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman. Or a bad woman; it
depends on how much happiness you can handle.
George Burns

I've been smoking for 30 years now and there's nothing wrong with my lung.
Freddie Starr

There's no smoking in restaurants in Los Angeles. Which is a bit ironic, considering that you
can't breathe the air outside a restaurant in Los Angeles.
Greg Proops

I kissed my first woman and smoked my first cigarette on the same day; I have never had
time for tobacco since.
Arturo Toscanini

A good cigar is as great a comfort to a man as a good cry to a woman.
E.G. Bulwer-Lytton

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