Richard Carlson quotes page 2
When you let someone else win an argument, often you both end up winners.
The key to a good life is this: If you're not going to talk about something during the last hour
of your life, then don't make it a top priority during your lifetime.
Ask yourself the question, "Will this matter a year from now?"
One of the most dynamic and significant changes you can make in your life is to make the
commitment to drop all negative references to your past, to begin living now.
Patience is one of those special qualities where success feeds on itself. Once you reach little
milestones - five minutes of successful patience - you'll begin to see that you do, indeed,
have the capacity to be patient, even for longer periods of time. Over time, you may even
become a patient person.
Children listen best with their eyes. What you do is what they hear.
Healing from a loss is a natural process of life - just as healing from a broken bone is too.
Knowing this in the midst of pain is of great comfort.
To a large degree, the measure of our peace of mind is determined by how much we are able
to live in the present moment.
The next time you find yourself in an argument, rather than defend your position, see if you
can see the other point of view first... Contrary to popular belief, this attitude does not make
Unhappiness doesn't and can't exist on its own. Unhappiness is the feeling that accompanies
negative thinking about your life. In the abscence of that thinking, the unhappiness, or
stress, or jealousy, can't exist. There is nothing to hold your negative feelings in place other
than your own thinking.
Turn your melodrama into a mellow-drama.
So many people spend so much of their life energy "sweating the small stuff" that they
completely lose touch with the magic and beauty of life.
If you regularly take a minute to check in with yourself, to ask yourself, "What's really
important?" you may find that some of the choices you are making are in conflict with your
own stated goals. This strategy can help you align your actions with your goals and
encourage you to make more conscious, loving decisions.
Life is a great deal more fun and much easier to manage when you stop blaming others. Give
it a try and see what happens.
When you learn the habit of responding to life with more ease, problems that seemed
"insurmountable" wil begin to seem more manageable. And even the "biggies," things that are
truly stressful, won't throw you off track as much as they once did.
I've found that simply reminding myself that life doesn't have to be a soap opera is a powerful
method of calming down.
The trick is to be grateful when your mood is high and graceful when it is low.
Breathe before you speak... I spent most of my life waiting for my turn to speak. If you're at
all like me, you'll be pleasantly amazed at the softer reactions and looks of surprise as you let
others completely finish their thought before you begin yours. Often, you will be allowing
someone to feel listened to for the very first time.
Our minds are powerful instruments. When we decide that something is true or beyond our
reach, it's very difficult to pierce through this self-created hurdle.
Practice random acts of kindness... There are five toll bridges in the San Francisco Bay Area.
A while back, some people began paying the tolls of the cars immediately behind them. The
drivers would drive to the toll window, and pull out their dollar bill, only to be informed, "Your
toll has been paid by the car ahead of you." This is an example of a spontaneous, random
gift, something given without expectation of or demand for anything in return. You can
imagine the impact that tiny gift had on the driver of the car! Perhaps it encouraged him to
be a nicer person that day. Often a single act of kindness sets a series of kind acts in
One of my favorite sayings comes from Seng-Ts'an. He said, "Our way is not difficult, save
the picking and choosing." Entire books and weeklong courses could be developed around
these words. The wisdom is simple, but extremely powerful and profound, particularly when
dealing with loss.
Don't sweat the small stuff... and it's all small stuff.
The old adage, "If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is" isn't always correct. In fact,
the suspicion, cynicism, and doubt that are inherent in this belief can and does keep people
from taking advantage of excellent opportunities.
Choose to be kind over being right and you'll be right everytime.