Dating quotes page 2
I asked my date what she wanted to drink. She said, "Oh, I guess I'll have champagne." I
said, "Guess again."
I prefer young girls. Their stories are shorter.
Natural childbirth classes are a great place to meet chicks, if you're into the fuller figure. And
you can be reasonably sure these girls put out.
The advantages of dating younger men is that on them everything, like hair and teeth, is in
the right place as opposed to being on the bedside table or bathroom floor.
Brains are never a handicap to a girl if she hides them under a see-through blouse.
The day he moved out was terrible - that evening she went through hell. His absence wasn't
a problem but the corkscrew had gone as well.
- I saw her giving me the once over.
- Yes, she looked once and it was all over.
Frasier Crane, Roz Doyle
I once had three dates on a single Saturday and still had time to defrost my refrigerator and
rotate my tyres.
Roz Doyle, Frazier
If you can't live without me, why aren't you dead yet?
Why is it so difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking? They all already
Men date thin girls because they're too weak to argue and they only eat salads.
If he hasn't called you in about three weeks and you have no idea where he is, the chances
are he's not in an emergency room moaning your name.
A woman says to a man, "I haven't seen you around here." "Yes," he says, "I just got out of
jail for killing my wife." "So you're single..."
I can't get a relationship to last longer than it takes to copy their CDs.
- How many women have you slept with?
- I don't care how you did it... just the numbers.
James Herbert, Stuart Bondek
I asked this girl out and she said, "You got a friend?" I said yes, she said, "Then go out with
To keep a man you must be a maid in the living room, a cook in the kitchen and a whore in
the bedroom. I hire the other two and take care of the bedroom bit myself.