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Anon quotes

In Britain, a dog is for Christmas. In Korea, it could be for breakfast, lunch or dinner.
Anon

He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.
Anon

You have two ears and one mouth. It is best to use them in that proportion.
Anon

Join the army, meet interesting people, and kill them.
Anon

When people hurt you over and over, think of them as sandpaper. They scratch and hurt
you. But later you'll be shining and polished, while they end up useless.
Anon

Youth wastes away. But immaturity often lasts a lifetime.
Anon

The only real difference between a dead skunk lying in the road and a dead lawyer lying in
the road is that there are skid marks around the skunk.
Anon

The sun goes down earlier for small people.
Anon

Yes - forgive your enemies whenever you can. But always remember their names.
Anon

How many actors does it take to change a light bulb? One hundred. One to change the bulb,
and ninety-nine to say, "I could have done that."
Anon

I knew I was drunk. I felt sophisticated and couldn't pronounce it.
Anon

Be nice to your children - they'll be choosing the old folks' home.
Anon

Procrastination is like masturbation. At first it feels good, but in the end you're only screwing
yourself.
Anon

Only Robinson Crusoe had everything done by Friday.
Anon

A distinguished diplomat could hold his tongue in ten languages.
Anon

Nicotine patches are great. Stick one over each eye and you can't find your cigarettes.
Anon

Erotic is when you use a feather. Kinky is when you use the whole chicken.
Anon

Experience is something you get just after you need it.
Anon

Tell a girl she is beautiful – she will believe it for a moment.
Tell a girl she's ugly – she will believe it for a lifetime.
Anon

To be honest with you, I don't have the words to make you feel better, but I do have the
arms to give you a hug, ears to listen to whatever you want to talk about, and I have a
heart; a heart that's aching to see you smile again.
Anon

The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking places.
Anon

Oh, for the good old days when people would stop Christmas shopping when they ran out of
money!
Anon

It takes 8,460 bolts to assemble an automobile, and one nut to scatter it all over the road.
Anon

Mothers and daughters are closest, when daughters become mothers.
Anon

He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.
Anon

Perfect maturity is when a person hurts you, and you try to understand their situation and
don't hurt them back.
Anon

Don't find love, let love find you. That's why it's called falling in love because you don't force
yourself to fall, you just fall.
Anon

Sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel really is an oncoming train.
Anon

In the 1960s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people
take Prozac to make it normal.
Anon

Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic's best friend.
Anon

Diplomacy: The business of handling a porcupine without disturbing the quills.
Anon

Between the optimist and the pessimist, the difference is droll: The optimist sees the the
doughnut; the pessimist the hole.
Anon

A daughter is a day brightener and a heart warmer.
Anon

Courtesy should be a continuous action, not something to be turned on and off like a faucet.
Anon

Youth wastes away. But immaturity often lasts a lifetime.
Anon

The tongue weighs relatively nothing, but so few people can hold it.
Anon

Cigarette, n.: A fire at one end, a fool at the other, and a bit of tobacco in between.
Anon